It has now been 10 days since I have indulged in that joy that I can have from my beloved pipe and pipe tobacco. I do miss her gentle caress. I have been holding an empty pipe in my hand as I fall asleep at night in hopes that I will have dreams in which I indulge in that magical joy and that graceful art. Thus far, unfortunately, I have had no such dreams.

In fact, since I have started the time of atonement 10 days ago, I have had NO dreams that I recall, nor do I have any feeling of having had dreams in these last 10 days. This too is sad, for I have so enjoyed my dream life.... it had always been vivid and invigorating and a true help to my real life.... both the dreams of how to deal with real occurances and the dreams of pure fantasay.

I wonder if my refraining from smoking my pipe has changed my dream states? It could of course, simply be an effect from my need for atonement, but it is interesting to postulate that perhaps my beloved briar pipes have been a sort of conduit to my rich dream state these many decades.

I am soon going to be able to write about the REASON I have adopted this horrid and rather harsh form of atonement for myself. To deny myself the pleasure, friendship, and joy that my pipes bring me, means the need for atonement is enormous.

PipeTobacco