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Cursed, Angry, and Hurt

I do not understand, nothing. Not a damn thing. I am about ready to crawl under a rock. I do not know what to do or how to cope with anything anymore. I feel as if there is no hope.

First, the entire weekend revolved a rampant case of the flu that has infected the family. Vomit spewed everywhere. I felt like a laundry service. Thus far, I am not sick. Thus far, all seem to be recovering with no horrid side effects thus far.

Second, my mother has experienced weight gain of the type that signifies something serious is happening. Last week when this happened, the nurse practioner (her heart specialist has gone to China for three weeks) for her heart specialist made some adjust ments to her medication. This seemed to make a small difference during Friday, Saturday and Sunday, but lo and behold, this morning, she had some significant weight gain. I do not know how to interpret this. It could be her arrythmia showing up, it could be congestive heart failure, it could be something new and even more horrid.

It is looking like it will be one hevlluva fun Thanksgiving.

I do not understand if I or my family is being singled out for God's wrath or not. But it sure feels like it. 2006 has not been my favorite year.

PipeTobacco