The Thoughts of a Frumpy Professor

............................................ ............................................ A blog devoted to the ramblings of a small town, middle aged college professor as he experiences life and all its strange variances.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Those "Damn Pipes"

Austere, a great friend and fellow blogger left a comment for me in my last essay where she stated that I was "doing great with those damn pipes".   I am very thankful for austere giving me this encouragement on the modicum of success I have been having.  I am also thankful for the encouragement I have been getting from BBC,  Doc Teri, and even an anonymous poster.  I am very appreciative.  I am continuing to be doggedly and damnably stubborn in my resolve to do what I say I am going to do.

The phrases "damn pipes" and "damn tobacco" that were mentioned in my comments section from yesterday, oddly enough, gave me a bit of a pause.  I do understand the sentiment.  Yet, the thought of calling both "damnable" made me feel a bit remorseful.

I think pipes are beautiful, many of them true works of art.  I have many, many pipes that I cherish, including several from my father and even two from my grandfather.  I think tobacco is an amazing plant as well.  I think it is quite beautiful when growing, I think it has amazing and interesting biochemical features, and as a consumable for humans, it gives an amazing phsysiological effect to us.

So, I do not think I can (at this time at least, and perhaps never) feel comfortable myself calling these items "damn pipes" or "damn tobacco".  I see too much I like in each and too much I appreciate about both.  Perhaps admitting this fact (initially to myself and now here as well), is helping me be a bit more successful in my reshaping of my relationship with pipe tobacco than I have ever been previously?  I think I can say with full conviction that I am, and I always will be neurally "wired" to be a pipe smoker.  I was a pipe smoker BEFORE I had ever sampled my first bowl of pipe tobacco (I have to remember to rerun the story of my first try a smoking a pipe, because I think it has relevance now again.).  I was (of course) a pipe smoker all during my many, many years of being a daily pipe smoker, and I think I shall remain one as a "special occasion pipe smoker" (my goal) and EVEN if I end up at some point in the future running out of "special occasions" and end up refraining entirely.

And, here is what I think may be the difference in my approach that is helping me.  I am fully stating for the record that I AM a pipe smoker... that is NOT changing.  What I am trying to change is my frequency of encounter, and making the choices more cognizantly my own, and not  something I feel driven to just "do".    When I used to contemplate quitting forever,  I would metaphorically hang the moniker "non-smoker" on a hook in my brain just to see how it felt to me, and it ALWAYS felt bad.  It always felt hollow and empty.  I always felt a sense of deprivation and a loss of self when I even thought about calling myself a "non-pipe-smoker." 

In my current approch, I do not feel deprived nor a sense of loss of self.  I of course do have nicotine cravings, but they have been bearable, and even my first big emotional test (see yesterday's essay) worked out relatively ok. 

And, while I was originally thinking earlier this week and gearing up for a "special occasion pipe smoking" event by planning to visit my elderly father-in-law this afternoon, unfortunately life has other plans for me.  I have a few unalterable duties I am going to be attending to this afternoon, and therefore, I have dubbed today's pipe goal to be "zero"  since I will not have the option to get over across the county to visit my father-in-law.

Maybe if I can get my act together and my grades done early enough between now and the end of the weekend, I might be able to finagle a "special occasion" visit for Monday or Tuesday of next week instead.  That is something to look forward to.  


Today's (Friday's) Goal =0 bowls 
Yesterday's (Thursday's) Goal = 0 bowls
Actual consumption (Thursday) = 0 bowls


Blogger BBC said...

It's like drinking, enjoy it but don't over do it, and we often over do smoking.

I've been smoking for over fifty years so I figure it's just time for me to drop it for good.

You're still doing great, carry on.

Teri is chain smoking and blowing shit up her nose, I'm going to go spank her ass. :-)

Friday, 14 December, 2012  
Blogger Doc Teri said...

Pipe - your philosophy is something like mine - I can't quite hang the mantle of "nonsmoker" on myself, but I doubt my ability to be a "casual smoker." Perhaps because cigarettes are nowhere near as aesthetically pleasing as a pipe.
But I am working on it.
Billy jests - I am not chain smoking (nor have I tried the nasal spray just yet as I didn't want to go into anaphylactic shock with Tim away). Still, I've backslid a bit...and Billy caught me at it today. I'll forgive him, though, as he's proven to be a true friend today. Tim and I are both grateful. He may appear to be a crotchety old m***erfu**er, but I know better. Sorry Billy - you outed yourself as a decent, caring individual, and we're grateful to you!
Keep it up, Pipe. I'm planning on getting back on the wagon now that my grades are submitted!

Friday, 14 December, 2012  
Blogger BBC said...

Of course I'm a crotchety old m***erfu**er,never fucked a virgin in my life, why in the hell would I want to fuck someone that didn't know what in the hell she was doing? :-)

Friday, 14 December, 2012  
Blogger austere said...

The way I see it--what a heroic, momentous effort to conquer Lady Nicotiana.

the pipes burnished wood and pleasing to the eye.yet.

Saturday, 15 December, 2012  

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