Today I had a bit Of a break through of sorts. I became better able to understand some of my own behavior today. I realized, even though I always kind of knew it, that I get very obsessed when people speak angrily to me when there is no reason. Now don't get me wrong, if a person has a bad day and speaks grumpily, but apologizes there is no problem. It is when they are just speaking angry for no reason related to me, and they don't apologize that is the issue.
I realized today that when the above happens, I am up fretting and ruminating about it for a very long time. It is foolish for me to do this. My first inclination is to want to confront them and explain how it made me feel. That usually ends badly, so I have learned to not confront the person immediately. But, the problem is that I then ruminate, and ruminate, and ruminate over the issue wasting my own time and usually become angry myself in the process.
The above happened today when I was interacting with a coworker who is supposed to help me with some aspects of one of my classes. This person was basically yelling at me about things that were not my fault. It took me a wihile to realize what I was doing and how it was a complete waste of my time. However , when I figured out how foolish I was being with my own time, I was able to refocus and get back on track.
I think this is an important thing for me to keep in mind when I get frustrated at others . I think this is a fail airily common reason for me to get irritated and it is just plain foolishness for me to waste my time this way. It IS my natural inclination to think and ruminate about these annoyances that sit unresolved, but if I can work at being more aware of them when they occur, I think I may be able to help myself resolve the pent up frustrations more readily. I am going to try to be more aware of these situations when they occur.