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Flash Fiction Post
Today happens to be the date (57 years ago on May 4, 1953) that Ernest Hemingway received the Pulitzer for his novel, The Old Man and the Sea. Therefore, I thought it fitting to attempt today's Flash Fiction Effort in my rendition of his noteworthy style.
Title: "Homage to Papa"
"Is it me, or does this coffee taste weird?" she said.
I look at my mug. The coffee is hot. The flavor is robust.
"No." I state.
"No, it doesn't taste weird? Or no, its me?" she looks towards me.
I think of work. Life was better then, before the Spring. The cold of the snow forced us together.
"It is fine." I say.
She looks at me. Her eyes are like daggers.
"You don't..." she starts.
Now the Spring has brought warmth. We do not need each other.
I look away. I get the keys out of my jacket. I pick up my pipe.
The harshness in her eyes diminishes. It is as if a light had dimmed.
"No, don't... please. We have flowers to plant."
Tears fall from her eyes. It is a sad, but true emotion. I am glad for her.
"No." I state again.
"You won't..." she begins, but does not finish.
I leave.
* * * * *
PipeTobacco
9 Comments:
Oooh! I like this. It's very tight. Also...the guy gives me the shivers a little bit. But I get him. I particularly like the lines "Tears fall from her eyes. It is a sad, but true emotion. I am glad for her."
There's a hint of dismissal, and also of resignation, in this guy. I like this.
definitely different, and I like it. Was a nice change, a little choppy but that gave it the perfect feel.
Flannery:
Thank you! I did really like that line... it felt very "Hemingwayesque"
to me.
Randal:
Thank you! Both of the words you use (dismissive and resigned) were feelings I was trying to create in the character.
Nicole:
Thank you also! The "choppiness" was intentional, for to me that is one of the more notable aspects of Hemingway's writing style. His manner of writing reads almost like a "staccato" sound from a musical instrument in my mind's ear.
PipeTobacco
http://frumpyprofessor.blogspot.com
This was a harsh dose of reality. Walking away from someone is not flowery and there's no fireworks that go off. The air isn't thick with emotion. That's only in the movies. This really illustrates the icy cold event called 'leaving'. Really well done.
" Now the Spring has brought warmth. We do not need each other."
No, HE doesn't need her!
A sad tale of parting, but beautifully told, Prof!
This seemed right on -- the poetic lines added to the somberness of the moment -- well done
Pipe, you really do tell a great story. Although a little bit different from your norm, a great read nonetheless. Keep it up my friend.
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