Admonishments / WDay 1591 / SDay 5
This seems a day that is appropriate for admonishments. So here they go all around for a lot of folks:
1. I admonish myself for not being particularly patient. I dislike that about myself and I wish to change.
2. I admonish myself for getting angry too readily and too often. I too wish to change that about myself.
3. I admonish myself for being too damn lazy. I need to step up my efforts in damn near everything in my life to be better than I am.
4. I admonish myself for not being forgiving enough. I should be able to be forgiving to people who have hurt me in my life, but it is something that does not come naturally to me. I struggle with this a great deal. I cannot seem to consistently get past some of these hurts, even though I can tell myself until I am blue in the face that a) the hurt and resentment only CONTINUES to hurt me, and b) I should be a bigger person than I am and be able to forgive.
Today will be day 5 of my implementation of SOPS V2. I am still going to be on somewhat "shaky" ground with this effort until the number is large enough that it has enough impact and meaning for me to want to avoid going back to day "zero" again. Day 5 is going to help me get to that larger number, so I am keeping that in my mind today, even though I know in my soul that 5 days aren't a whole helluva lot and I could indulge and just start again. But, I need to keep in my mind that a) I have a potential special occasion coming up this Friday, and b) if I were to indulge in a pipe or two today, all that would happen is that it will take me that much longer to get to a real number that has meaning and impact to help me on this goal.
I could not find my stopwatch at home this morning, so I tried to judge my speed for the mile on the track today. I *think* I ran the mile in 7minutes and 15 seconds. I am happy with that, but want to check with a real stopwatch sometime later this week. Of course, the indoor running and weight training DOES NOT eliminate my walking 5 miles outside every day. On that walking score, today is day 1591.
First.... I really do not wish to use the rather limited time I have to be dealing with moderating the comments on my blog. I am 100% fine with anyone commenting to me, even in crude ways, about my writing, my behavior, or my actions. So, you may have free reign at that. I will let hurtful things slide if they happen, and I will accept positive and helpful comments if any are given. So, please realize that is not an issue for me at all.
However, I am asking for your help in not badgering other commenters here on this site. First off, I want to tell you that BBC is a VERY good and VERY strong Internet friend of mine, and do not want my comments section to become a place where he feels badgered or hurt. To the best of my ability, I will be eliminating comments that are hurtful to him. ALT-F, I have grown to appreciate your comments and wit towards me, and I thank you for them. To the best of my ability, I will be eliminating comments that I perceive as hurtful towards you as well. Anonymous (who may or may not be Leslie), I too have appreciated your comments towards me, and I have found insight in several things you have mentioned towards me. To the best of my ability, I will be eliminating comments that I perceive as hurtful towards you as well. Therefore, the following admonitions can be given and I ask you to take them in the spirit intended:
5. I ask all of you who comment here.... you may say whatever the hell you want to or about me positive or negative. But, I ask you kindly to not badger each other.
6 I ask all of you who comment here.... please help to make my life a little bit more friendly and a little bit easier.... treat each other with gentleness and respect. You do not have to treat me that way, but I need for you to treat each other that way. If you cannot treat each other with gentleness and respect, please simply ignore those you cannot do this for.
Today's (Tuesday's) Goal = 0 bowls
Monday's [1/29] Goal = 0 bowls
Actual consumption (Monday) = 0 bowls