Seventy-Two
Still not feeling particularly verbose at the moment. However, I can report that today is the 72nd day I have consecutively refrained from smoking a pipe. I do think about pipes every day still. But, I have to say that much of the time, the desire to smoke a pipe, while present and desired, is not overwhelming.
However, this is not true all of the time. Sometimes the feelings are very powerful and consume most of my thoughts. The most recent instance began roughly a week ago while watching a play. The play had no direct correlation to my pipe, but while watching and enjoying the performance, I did have a very strong sense of anticipation to have a pipe when I returned home that evening. The anticipation and the desire for a pipe grew as the play ended and became stronger on the drive home. At home, as my wife went upstairs to change clothes into her pajamas, I took the dog out for her evening constitutional and reached for a pouch of my pipe tobacco and a pipe. As I sat outside while waiting for the dog to accomplish her "tasks", I meticulously filled the bowl of my pipe and eagerly brought the pouch of tobacco up to my nose and relished the delightful aroma. Holding the stem of the pipe in my mouth, I had my lighter ready and even spun the lighter's wheel to create a flame. I really had every intention of smoking my pipe, but I hesitated. Not because I did not want to smoke my pipe, but because of the guilt I know I would feel inside because it was not what I had willed myself to do.
I kept debating back and forth with myself about this for probably 20 minutes before I put the filled pipe away and went back inside with the dog and went to bed.
PipeTobacco
4 Comments:
Good for you. Good luck on your continuing journey to better health and a longer life!
i'm happy to hear you're still not smoking! congrats!
Great job and your being honest with your self. Which is part of the battle.
Coffee is on
I noticed that your blog is now closed. I hope you will go back to writing it. I miss your thoughts.
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