Well, yesterday was rough. Today will hopefully be a start of a new perspective on life. I think I will talk about the "cool guy syndrome".

I use the vernacular "cool guy syndrome" because it seems to typify the message I wish to bring to all of you today. I think that many of us may share the same sorts of feelings and perhaps if we can keep this idea in our mind it may help us....

Many of us were outsiders in our K-12 experience. What I mean is that we were not part of the "elite" click of folks who seemed to run the place and hence our world. People of the "elite" click determined who were "in" and who were "out". They determined what was "cool" and what was not. I *was not* part of the click. Instead, I spent my time with a bunch of wonderful people who typically were classified as the "nerds", or the "brains", and our group also embraced many of the "loners" and others as well. Well, whether it is a psychological truism or not, I feel that for most of us, the developmental period that occurs in junior high school and high school shapes how we *view* ourselves. A case in point:

In my day to day actions, subliminally, I still consider myself a "nerd" or an "outsider" and when I meet a new person, I will usually adopt that same posture/position in how I deal with this person. Typically, I presume first that the person is one of the "cool" people and that I need to defer to them.

In my adult mind, when I have a few minutes to work thorough my innate reaction, I can of course realize that in most cases in adulthood, those damnable labels of "cool" or "geek" or "nerd" do not apply, but it *does* take a very concerted effort to act outside of my original "nerd/outsider" role. I think that unfortunately, since it is the developmental experience I had growing up, it is deeply imbedded in me... but I feel that if I can learn and force myself to not have that initial gut response, I could make significant leaps in my own happiness and contentment in life. And, as a bonus, I think I could also be more successful in making other's lives happy and healthy as well.

Therefore, my sole New Year's Resolution for 2004 is thus:

I hope and plan to not continue to adopt those subserviant roles of "nerd" or "outsider" in my dealings with others. Instead, I wish to have *MY FIRST THOUGHT* to be that we are all equals with value and inherent worth.

If I can do this at the start, instead of having to work through my own feelings of inadequacy before I get to that notion of equality, I think I will have accomplished an enourmous amount. It will benefit me, my family, my work, and my dealings with others. That is my hope for 2004.

My beautiful briar pipe is now cold. I think I shall close here for today.

Pipe Tobacco