Ethereal Mindset

Of course there really is never a bad time to be allowed "activity" with my beloved wife, I must admit that I find an especially strong fondness for such activity in the early morning hours.  The stars were fortunately aligned this morning when I awoke at 4:30 am.  My wife too had awoken, and as we started to cuddle a bit and talk, one thing led to another and we were soon finding ourselves in a delightfully passionate course of "activity".  As such "activity" inevitabally leads back to cuddling and pleasantly groggy additional rest, my run for the morning was delayed a bit.  I did not get out the door to begin my five mile run until 6:15am.  But, I have now completed the run, and it was far easier to focus on the run itself.  Usually, in addition to praying the rosary during my run, I usually end up with my mind side tracking to concerns about work in the day ahead.  This morning, no such drift occurred an I stayed clear in my prayer and in my contemplation on how to become a better husband, father, and person which is what I try to stay focused on durin my run.  

As I sit out here on the back porch now, enjoying my first pipe of the day while the dog eats and does her "business", I still feel a wonderful sense of serenity, relaxation, and yes, even a focus, although it is admittedly a bit ethereal in nature.  

When I soon head in to get ready to go to work at the U. I hope to maintain this surreal, ethereal feeling of tranquility.   

I went to a special Mass yesterday where there was special time alloyed for individual and communal penance (for those of you unfamiliar with Roman Catholic practices, special masses of this sort happen frequently as we approach Easter, even though penance can be conducted anytime through the year).  I was glad I could fit the added Mass into my excessively hectic Tuesday, yesterday.  To confess all my wrongs with a sincere heart and to ask for forgiveness was quite freeing to me.  It had been almost five weeks since my last confession, which was far longer than I should have gone, so I unfortunately used a great deal of time with the priest.  However, he was able to help me shape my focus so that I do feel I have a path I can use to try to become the better, kinder person I do wish to be.  I just have to keep trying and trying to be better, and I have to be more aware that even incrimental steps in the right direction eventually add up (much like my exercise) and that I should be more cognizant of my failures, but also aware more on how I am in some small ways becoming more the good, kind, helpful person I wish to become.

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