Split Pea Soup
Taking a brief break from class preparation tasks and research tasks to try to write here a little bit earlier so I am not as tired. I will get back to the work things in a few moments. We are having split pea soup for dinner tonight after I get back from the U, so that should be wonderful.
I still think the CDC has become corrupt. It *USED* to be a bastion of science and the public interest. Now, it is just another in the long line political groups. It used to be a governmental agency I could be proud of. The other agency that went through very hard times during the Trump era was the EPA. I am *hoping* they return to truth and science. I am not sure where they are at the moment, because the agency itself has been rather low-key during the last year. In my mind's eye, I imagine the EPA as a cat that was in a fight with another cat, and that it is now quietly licking its wounds and trying to recover. I hope this is the reality and that it doesn't become a non-science focused, political b*llsh*t machine.
Margaret asked me yesterday if a return to my pipes would be happy and joyous or would fill me with guilt. I unfortunately suspect I would feel both joy and guilt:
1. I would feel joy at the actions, tastes, flavors, patterns, and fussing that pipe smoking provides and encourages.
2. I would feel joy at the gentle relaxation to my mind and the gentle soothing of my neurons that a beautiful bowl of pipe tobacco can provide.
3. I would feel guilt about going back on my word.
I have been told occasionally by several folks that I have "Catholic Guilt". I do have to admit I feel guilty about things from time-to-time. I am not so sure it is really a "Catholic" thing, because I have heard folks mention "Jewish Guilt" as well..... but in general, I think being *open* to feeling guilt about a failing or a shortcoming seems a rather healthy sort of response.
If I were to pick up one of my pipes here in my back office, and fill and light it, I am sure I would feel both a sense of happiness and a sense of guilt. Probably I would feel both simultaneously too.
The next thought though, is what would it *mean* for me to begin again? Would I just return to the fold and I would feel "all-in"? Would I *be able to* regain that beautifully nonchalant participation in the hobby? Or would it be simply bringing back the damnable "Lone Wolf" sense of isolation? There is a difference between being alone and being lonely. I am not sure if I went back to my pipes if I would be a happy pipe smoker who just happens to smoke alone, or if I would be a lonely pipe smoker, feeling the loss from having no pipe comrades?
Two of the nations with the highest rates of pipe smoking these days (it is still a very small percentage even in these countries) are Germany and Poland. I do have a significant chunk of German ancestry, and I have a kind kindship with Polish culture, and I would not be surprised if some of my ancestors may have Polish or at least on the Polish side of German. I was looking at a German Pipe shop online the other day, and some of their pipes were beautiful beyond measure, and it was nice seeing all the smiling folks that had their photos taken at the shop. I have found a Polish pipe shop that is similar, but that was quite a few months ago.
Well, I had better get back to work.
PipeTobacco
5 Comments:
On the topic of loneliness, haven't your pipes been lonely for the years while you've been gone? To whatever extent you can appreciate your pipes as old friends, you won't ever be lonely when you go back to them.
Now, that won't be the same as if you could spend a year teaching at a German university, or if you could transport yourself back to 1970 in the USA.
Professor, when I went back to my pipes after a long absence, I felt guilty very briefly, as I found myself diving in and almost overcompensating for a while for my years of abstinence. But things balanced out after a while, and my only regret now is the years I spent trying to pretend that I could ever be happy without my pipes.
As for being a "Lone Wolf"? I wonder if that's going to be part of your personality with or without pipes. Your sense of standing against the world's insanity over COVID, for example, paints you inevitably as something of a Lone Wolf. And if you're going to be a lone wolf no matter what, surely it's better that you be one with a pipe in hand.
You've been on quite a journey, but I think you are almost ready to come home where you belong, again enjoying the companionship of your most patient and faithful old friends.
I gather than both you and your wife like to putter in the kitchen. Neither of us love it these days as we both have back issues.
Although the Welsh government is better than the English as far as the pandemic is concerned - actually in every way - there doesn't seem to be clear information around at the moment. We're just being sensible really: not mixing, wearing masks, taking tests. But we're retired so it's simple for us.
Professor...
From what I've read, pipe-smoking is a part of your personality, an endemic part. As far as feeling like a "Lone Wolf", I think most of us feel that way about one thing or the other, for whatever reason...only many people don't acknowledge it and keep chasing an imaginary sense of belonging and extreme examples are bad relationships, toxic organizations, or dangerous group-think. I've suggested them before but I think the YouTube Pipe Community provide a great sense of camaraderie amongst your fellow pipe-smokers. Very informal, people from all walks of life are on there. Some review tobaccos, some just talk about their life, about their "pipe journey" I've made many friends across the world because of it. One user, Dale Piper from Durham, England was once so shy, he began his channel speaking from off-camera before he got comfortable with the format. Or you could just be a "lurker" if you don't want to do videos. Just let them play in the background as I do when I'm off on walks. They're really a genuine, friendly group of people. Once again, I will post one of mine here...and remember, Professor...in a very significant way, you helped to get me to this stage in my own pipe-discovery. (five.minutes.ahead.of.my.time@gmail.com if you have any questions.)
https://youtu.be/unulkDipAIw
I think you should do what brings you happiness as long as it doesn't also cause a lot of guilt. It's such a destructive emotion in my experience. I love split pea soup, especially in the winter. It's comfort food.
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