Out and About
I decided to "bite the bear" this morning and I went running for 16.1 miles (~26 km) this morning. Only ~ 2 miles (~3.2 km) was on sidewalk that I had to be gingerly careful watching. The rest was on a newly paved trail that was pleasantly smooth and devoid of cracks and pavement upheavals. It was actually quite nice to run through woods and fields in the very early morning daylight. I started at 6:15 am.
My suggestion of "biting the bear" in the above is an attempt to play off of my tumble last week. Tomorrow I will be having the stitches removed. "Biting the bear" to me symbolizes that I am trying to a) be more careful and cognizant when I am running on sidewalks to avoid tripping, and b) that I am forcing myself back into running in places beyond the simple loop that is very safe for me.... but not very interesting or motivating. Running to more distant areas and new areas I have not ran is quite enjoyable and I think it is good for my emotional well-being.
The person I attempt to not write about here was unpleasant to my wife (and me) this weekend, and the unpleasantness really affected my wife emotionally, especially since yesterday was Mother's Day. I was emotionally hurt too, but I have ended up taking it as "par for the course" if you get what I mean. My wife is still hurting quite a bit. I have tried to be there for her as best as I can figure out how, but unfortunately her emotions about the matter have had her respond in a brusque fashion to me, and that typically means I need to "back off" a bit myself, so in effect, I feel rather lonely.
I am not having any real "yearnings" (deep, intense desires) to smoke my pipes and pipe tobaccos today. That is not to say I haven't been thinking about them, for I have. Thinking about them feels somehow "happy" in a way. Imagining smoking them feels "pleasant" and the act of imagining this feels "centering" to me emotionally. I am not sure if that is progress towards a goal of potentially being able to become an occasional pipe smoker, or if I have ingrained in me strongly enough the idea of not "acting out" and making decisions when hurt or stressed (aka, eating a bunch of junk food like I used to when hurt/stressed, perhaps also aka, not smoking my pipe when hurt/stressed) that pipe "yearnings" are dampened down by my hurt/stress.
PipeTobacco
3 Comments:
Is this person a teenager? Because that type of snippy behavior can be normal for them. Still not acceptable, but easier to de-personalize if one knows it's a stage and more about him/her than about the parent. Been through it twice and it's not easy. My heart was bruised many times.
There comes a point at which tolerance of another person's bad behavior becomes enabling of that behavior. If your actions (or lack thereof) are causing "the person" to feel emboldened in bad behavior, then you shouldn't be surprised when it continues. If you are preventing the person from experiencing the consequences of the unpleasant behavior, you are essentially asking for that behavior to continue.
If your wife says that she is hurt but she won't do what it takes to stop receiving such hurt, then I hope you can help her understand that she isn't helping the situation.
Stopping the hurt might mean learning to walk away when the hurt is caused. It might mean separating from that person for a while, or even permanently if the situation is too far gone. Be careful -- if "that person" is too far gone, yet you don't separate, that person could even drag you down. Please don't let that happen to you or your wife, Professor!
I am happy for you that the running is going well. Sorry about the other , though, particularly on MDay.
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