"Pipey Feelings"

 

I am not sure..... it could be a) just a random physiological cycle, b) a ratcheting up of stress as I wait for the start of the first day of the semester, or c) a decades long-established, nearly ritualistic pattern in me.... but I am in what could be described as a "Super Pipey Mood"..... I would easily say I am at a PCS of 9 or even a few tenths further up the scale.  

Perhaps it IS just a random physiological cycle.  I have, over these last 4.5 years.... had a rather undulating ride of it.  Sometimes it has been DAMN DIFFICULT to not pick up my pipes, and occasionally it has been more tolerable.  My feelings have undulated many times across this period.  

Perhaps it IS just stress.  I still do not understand why after all these decades of teaching and researching..... hell..... after all these decades of "professoring" why on Earth do I still have stress and jitters the week before it all begins?  It is damn stupid of me to feel this way.  The jitters slow me down and are just a waste of time.  But, I guess I have come to realize that I am a damn stupid fool who is as slow as molasses most of the time anyway, so this is par for the course, I guess.  

And, perhaps it IS part of that "ritualistic pattern" I organically developed so very long ago.  When I was smoking my pipe in an unencumbered, non-measured way..... just by whim or happenstance....  there was always an elevation in the number of pipes I would indulge in each day during that week prior to the start of the semester.  Back when it was a more pure and easy and gentle time, the pipes felt like, hell... they WERE a form of mental nutrition for me to enjoy and indulge in as I attempted to create, and prepare, and plan the supposed "big thoughts" that are technically what I, as a "professor" am supposed to be able to generate or innately have...  and then be able to bring forth and deliver to the masses of young students seeking my care and tutelage. 

I just don't know.... well.... I don't know a whole helluva lot of anything.... but I DO know I miss my pipes today, something fierce.  

* * * * * 

I was quite sleepy still when my damn alarm on my phone started its incessant clanging, forcing me to crawl out of bed across the room to shut the damn thing off at 4:01 am.  I FORCED myself to hit the trail by 4:15 am.  Fortunately, there was enough reflected moonlight that it was pretty easy to navigate as I hoofed through 13.2 miles (~21km).  It was  not a "pleasant" run.... but instead.... a "get the damn thing done" run.  

* * * * *

The BEST part of my morning, however, was when I was able to take our dog out in the backyard for her daily, morning constitutional.  She was so happy to just be looking around, her tail wagging, and her eyes sparkling in the early morning light.  She deposited her usual "present" fairly quickly, and I used a gloved hand to pick up this present to dispose of properly.  When she pants, like she usually does after drinking water, I can see her one slightly crooked incisor tooth that makes me grin.  It just makes her look even cuter.  As she is a mix, but seems to have a lot of Wheaton Terrier in her, she has a dense, curly coat and grows a big, fluffy goatee.  But, she has an appointment this Friday for a trim (she does not shed, but just gets more and more fluffy and she needs a trim every couple of months to keep from having her curls become matted).  

* * * * * 

My wife and I are keeping our fingers crossed that we will get to go swimming this afternoon.  We relish the quieter time together and like the feeling of coolness and refreshment that the pool provides.  It is also great because my wife is also much more awake and we get to talk and focus on each other.  While we technically do swim some, the best part is the half an hour where we spend WALKING back and forth in a lane where we can talk with each other.  For me, I walk backwards (which is really nice for using my leg muscles in the opposite way I do with running, so it helps me stretch out more and relax) and my wife walks forward in the lane so that she can try to expend as much energy as possible to help her in her glucose control.  But.... the TALKING is the best part of the swim (but the immense body cooling is incredibly important too).

PipeTobacco