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Monday Morning and Coffee

It is Monday and I have a helluva lot of work to do prior to my meeting. Actually, I have too damn much to do and little motivation to do it. "Unfortunately, the planned "sloshiness" for Friday did not pan out as my father-in-law had a late afternoon doctor's appointment. My wife and I simply contined to work on the yard.

Yard work is both a chore but a theraputic agent as well. The sweat and the toil help put you in a different frame of mind. The repetitive monotony of the yard work is a time I have grow fond of looking forward to as it is a time where I can think more openly and wildy. Some of my most creative thoughts occur during those times.

My wife was very kind to me this weekend and bought me a pound of freshly ground hazlenut coffee beans. I am currently on cup (mug) #4 of the first double-strength pot this morning. Coffee is especially enjoyable on Monday morning as I often do not drink coffee during the weekend and I have elimiated the caffeine from my metabolism. I feel the elevated alertness and the pleasant firing in my neurons.

If I get all my necessary work done for my talk at the endocrine meeting done early enough today, I think I will spend some long-needed time grooming some of my pipes for the trip. As a pipe smoker of long standing, I know the value of cleaning a pipe and dressing it to keep its appearance up and its condition fresh. However, like most pipe smokers I know, the task is one that is often neglected far longer than it should be. I attribute this to two factors:

1. Virtually all pipe smokers I know (myself included) are very active sorts... be it mental or physical or both. They tend to be the sort of individual who spends a large amount of time going from task to task to task... and minor details can sometimes be neglected in the rush to begin another task. This may seem to "fly in the face" of the "contemplative" pipe smoker, but I think it really does not. Contemplation can (and is if a person is active) be a very mentally focused effort. The stereotype that has evolved is that of a person basically wasting time in a torpor-like daydream state where damn little gets done. However, for most real-life pipe smokers contemplation is a time of real deep, robust thought and requires a great deal of mental energy and resources to accomplish. The befuddled, pipe-smoking nit who has his heads in the clouds and accomplishes damn little is pretty much a fallicy (except perhaps when I or any pipe smoker has downed a few stiff drinks).

2. The ritual of cleaning a pipe is one that for me tends to induce in me feelings of meloncholy. The ritual itself is pretty straight forward... you need pipe cleaners, a short, sharp knife (I use one of the blades from my Swiss Army Knife), a bottle of some sort of spirits (for me, I have taken to using a cheeap whiskey lately), a soft brush (I use an old toothbrush), a small bottle of lemon oil, and a soft towel (chamois is my towel of choice for this task). The meloncholy comes from the ritual itself. This task above most other tasks is one that I so vividly associate with my own, dearly departed father. He, being a far more meticulous man than I have ever been, scheduled a full cleaning of all his pipes on the first Saturday of each month during the very early hours of the morning. I do not know how many times I would sit there as a child, watching him clean and groom his entire collection of pipes with gentle determination. Then as an older child, I would help him in this process, and eventually during my teen years into adulthood, we would often work together on this task for our respective pipes. Since his passing, the ritual, just as important as ever, now gives me a chance to recall our times together and typically this induces a saddness because I miss him.

So, if and when I get the work done for the meeting, I shall sit here at my inner office table behind my lab, and go through the ritual of cleaning for at least four of my pipes (I shall take four with me to the meeting... one "dressy" pipe for use during the formal dinners and other occasions where I wear formal clothes, one nice looking pipe for when I am wearing a casually dressy attire (sport coat, for example), and two of my "work horse" pipes for regular smoking during the "off" times.

First, I will take my pocketknife and gently scrape away the built up deposits of charr that form inside the bowls, reaming the bowls back to their full inner dimensions. Next I shall gently guide a pipe cleaner through each stem and shank to remove any deposits that have built up. Third, I will brush the inside of each bowl gently with the dry toothbrush to remove any dust created through the reaming process and to spruce up the top of the bowl that often becomes charred during lighting. Fourth, I will take the chamois and gently rub the exterior of the pipe, stem-to-stern, using a drop or two of lemon oil (if needed) to improve the shine of the bowl. Then finally I will take and old pencil holder I have had for at least 15 years, pour a shot of whiskey down the length of the compartment and put a few pipe cleaners into this fluid. Then using a few of the pipe holders I have and place each pipe onto one of the spots on the holder, take out a whiskey infused pipe cleaner and gently insert it from the stem through the shank and into the bowl of each pipe. Then I will fill each bowl to near the brim with the whiskey and let them sit for an hour or two. Afterwards, I will then pour the whiskey out into the sink, remove the pipe cleaners, and let the pipes air dry for a few hours. The pipes are then ready for service and are fresh, clean and will be ready for my trip.

PipeTobacco