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Peeling An Onion
This is one of those "odd" days, I believe. I woke up this morning hearing a David Haas song in my head (he is a writer of music used in the Roman Catholic Mass). It gave me a feeling of melancholy about all the things I wish I had done better in my life... being a better father, a better husband, a more aware person about the love I have been given and so desperately crave.
The melancholy seemed to be especially all-encompassing, as it remained as I sat outside having a pipe and then even when I went on my five mile walk at 5 am. I almost let the feelings of sadness overwhelm me, but persevered and continued on.
Instead of crawling back into bed after my walk, I continued on with my daily tasks/chores before heading to the gym. I then went and showered and got dresses for my work here at the U.
This morning, I have written three tests so far, and I have written four other documents... all in an effort to keep busy to help dissipate the melancholy frame of mind I am in. Now I will go and lecture for a few hours.
I hope I feel happier soon.
PipeTobacco
4 Comments:
I swear, you deal with more shit in your mind than I do. But on the other hand I'm not straddled with the fucked up catholic religion.
religion in itself screws with your mind because it makes you think that you have to go sit with a big group of people at least weekly in order to get to heaven, and that being "saved" is more important than being good to your neighbor ("not by works, lest any man should boast")... bleh. and some "religions" teach that if you do what they preach you'll never "have the blues" - BS on that.
I hope you get over your case of the blues, and see, even though I've been lurking in the shadows, I still keep up on ya!!
Lynx217
My pipe post will be in the morning.
Hey, I'm tired of looking at the fucking onions.
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