Naughty or Nice?
I do not really know how to think about myself over the past year. Have I been naughty or nice? I would like to think and believe I have been a nice person and a helpful person. But, truth be told... perhaps I have failed? Sometimes I do try to be a good person.... but I often do not try as hard as I could. Sometimes I am lazy. Sometimes I am not trying to make things better.
But, then again, there are ways in which I do try. There are ways in which I recognize and strive to be helpful and strive to be the better person I can be.
But, is it enough? Is the question "Is it enough?" an indication that I am weak willed and lazy and only work to the MINIMUM I am capable of? Should I instead work feverishly to always be improving, improving who I am for others, improving life for others, working to improve life as tirelessly as a hamster on a wheel?
I do not know if there are any real answers to be had, but I do know that sometimes I think I am good, and kind, and helpful, and other times I fear I am just a lazy, worthless lout.
These are some of the thoughts percolating through my mind this Christmas Eve morning.
PipeTobacco
5 Comments:
Does your faith teach you that you should be the best "you" that you can be? Or does it teach you to be someone ELSE's idea of what you should be?
Are you the result of random chance? Or is your existence the purposeful choice of a Creator? If the latter, does your Creator want you to be what other people want you to be? Or do you have a unique purpose and destiny as YOU?
If you are a unique person with a unique destiny, then WHO CAN JUDGE what is "lazy" and what is "respecting your limits" or "coping with circumstances" or "tending to your own weaknesses before you can help others"?
Does your faith teach you that there is no such thing as a person who has "done enough"? Even the saints make stupid mistakes at times, and there is always one more leper or indigent or broken person who could have been helped. Isn't the difference between saints and sinners ultimately that the former take full advantage of the Mass and the sacraments? Isn't the ultimate difference that the saints on planet Earth, members of the Church Militant, stop worrying and instead put their trust in their Savior and in the Church Triumphant?
You are looking for answers, and these are just questions, but maybe they can help you focus your thoughts and find some encouragement and a way forward.
Also, I can't help but notice that Old Saint Nick in your photo is enjoying a pipe. Pipe-smoking doesn't guarantee sainthood, but neither is it a sin. If you go back to your pipes at some point, whether days or years from now, I hope you have learned that you are a rational actor with tremendous will-power, not a "lazy, worthless lout." For good reason, you have deprived yourself of something pleasurable for more than ten months. However, if you go back to your pipes because you rationally conclude that you are more wholly "you" as a pipe-smoker, please don't take that decision as failure. One way or another, have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
don't be so down on yourself..everyone thinks they are lacking in areas of their lives..best you can do is just try.
Perhaps you are overthinking it.
You can't change what's past; you can't control the future: now is all you have so enjoy it.
the Ol'Buzzard
Merry Christmas Professor!
Pat, Jackiesue, OldBuzzard, and Jane:
I am not sure what setting I must have messed with but not I am not able to reply to your posts individually. I will figure it out and fix it. But, I do thank you for your comments!
Pat... I may try to answer a few of your questions in my next post.
JackieSue.... I do try to not get down on myself. But, it is hard at times when I feel I fail at trying to help.
OldBuzzard... I would suspect your point is VERY valid. I do tend to ruminate about things far more than I probably should.
Jane... Thank you!!!! I hope you have a wonderful Christmas Season as well!
PipeTobacco
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