Bootstraps
Trying to "pull myself up by my bootstraps" so-to-speak so that I can get out of this dark storm-cloud mood. I have to learn to accept "what is" versus "what I would like it to be". It is easier said, than done of course. But, it is the only option I have.
I guess I have adapted in some fashion. Just like I have learned over the years to NOT eat out of hurt or frustration.... I find that in this state of mind that the "NOT do" also applies to my pipes. I have had rather "minimal" interest in thinking about pipes or even a potential pipe adventure during this mood. That is probably a positive, for if I were to have an opportunity to have a pipe, I WOULD NOT want to waste that special event with the state of mind I am in. Perhaps that is why I still had some trouble falling asleep last night, as I could not even conjure up happy thoughts of previous pipes when I was trying to sleep.
But, again.... the goal is to lift myself up by my bootstraps.... force myself through this to a better place again. It is hard to do, but I have done it before. I just have to do it again. I wish things were different, but all wishes will do is, if I add a $1.00 to them, is allow me to buy a refill cup of coffee. Without the wishes, it would still be $1.00 for that refill cup, so.... well.... it is, what it is.
- Ran 8.6 miles (~14 km) this morning. My heart was not into it, and sloughed through just to get it done.
- Worked some in the garden. Harvested some chard. Harvested some herbs (parsley, basil, mint). Harvested one tomato and three banana peppers. Harvested several zucchini.
- Working on embryology.
2 Comments:
Family stuff? I too have been brought low by some drama in that regard. I hope you can get to a place of peace and acceptance after first grieving how you would have wanted it to be. It's hard to let go of our expectations.
They do say that happiness is a choice, but it can be very difficult to get to the place where we can make that choice. A very long time ago, when I was having a difficult time, I discovered The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings. I lost myself in that fantasy world and came out in a better place.
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