So, anger does not seem to readily dissipate.

I am angry and I am going to talk about why. The fellow in question is going to be called Dr. Train. Train is a big, blustery, bull of a person who uses mean, cutting remarks, and assinine inuendo to get his own way at every opportunity. What I get so damn frustrated about is that in our Department, Train rules the roost. He is feared and bowed down to by damn near everyone in our department. Our lab technician in fact, has a mixture of awe and fear about Train that makes her unable to do or say or support anyone who Train does not support. It is ludicrious and obscene.

In the situation that has set me off, we are in the process of hiring a new faculty member and after a tiresome 3 hour meeting where people were yelling at and pissiing eachothher off..... we finally hammer out a resolution that says we will submit three names. *If* additional names are needed (because someone withdraws) we will then meet again to discuss if any of the other candidates should be included.

BUT NO!!!! Train, the bully that he is, begins by sending around a ranting memo telling us that to save time we need to agree to submit the next person in line immediately. Asshole Train then accuses those that disagree with his tactics (which includes me) that we are weak or that we always are "pole sitters" who never make a decision. The only real *problem* is that we do not agree with his desired decision. And when we disagree further, he rants and raves and acts like the truly nasty individual he is.

I am mostly angry because I replied with a memo of my own stating calmly the reasons for my negative decision. I was initially proud of myself for not stooping to his level by calling him names, and by simply stating the facts of the situation and what I felt was a fair and equitable solution. On Friday, this initially made me feel good.

However, I am still angry as hell and I am not sure why. I despise the rude, obnoxious tone he used in his memo to me, and even though I feel good about my response, my anger lies in the fact that I also want to *zing* him back.... to have him feel what he made me and others in the Department feel. I know that is not the right thing to do, yet I wish to do it. Also, I realize it will not improve matters in the Department, but I still wish to do it. My anger stems from my not being able to figure out a way to let me logical mind..... the mind that tells me I did the right thing..... overrule my vengeful mind that wants to give him back what he gave me. I am at a loss for what to do.

PipeTobacco