Comments

Comments on comments:

AC said...

"Maybe you are forcing it with the group if it isn't a spontaneous, natural sort of thing? Or maybe it will grown on you more. Or maybe, cigars just aren't pipes and never will be. Who knows? I don't for sure.

I may have misspoke yesterday.  I did not mean that I disliked the "Retiree's Cigar Group" because I actually had a nice experience last week.  I meant that yesterday, my stress was not something that seemed to be something the "Retiree's Cigar Group" would help quell..... and that I was having a strong craving for a pipe.... which, strange as it may seem to many, to me.... feels VASTLY different than a cigar.  

"Yes, I was going to suggest Tile or an airtag or whatever.

I received the airtags yesterday (I got them instead of a "Tile" as it appears smaller and thinner (less obtrusive)).  Hopefully, my wife and I can figure them out this weekend. 

GaP said....

"...but when I just accepted the fact that I am, indeed, a tiny, microscopic cog in this Rube Goldberg contraption called capitalist society, I felt liberated. 

I agree with you.  It is just SOMETIMES the thought of being a cog can also feel a bit sad.

Josh said.... 

Remember my comment about being a "bad boy"? Perhaps it is time to blow off some steam. Humans aren't machines and you should think of yourself sometimes.

I do remember that comment from you, and I do believe it has significant merit.  There are times where I have very much imagined if I were to be more of a "bad boy" meaning I just lived life filled with gusto and on the edge and was sort of a hedonist looking for pleasure.  I do not know if I could ever pull it off with my personality.... or if I would feel comfortable really BEING that way..... but it does have a real appeal at least in my imagination at times.  

Even if I could emulate your restraint, I don't think I would mainly because life is far too short.

I find it interesting that you feel I display restraint.  At some level it feels both "good" that I am perceived that way but also sometimes a bit "embarrassing" that I am perceived that way.  I tend to have minimal insight into how others perceive me.  And, yet, I also am not sure how I would want others to perceive me if I could change myself.  It is a somewhat elusive idea in many regards and perhaps it is so in part because I do not even fully understand how I perceive myself.  I feel that INSIDE I am just all over the map most of the time.

Katrina said....

I hope you have a good time on your own while your wife is traveling, and pamper yourself a bit

As I wrote on Monday, my big "pamper" ended up being my allowing myself one bottle of a very pleasant IPA.  The rest of the time I just worked.  Well, I take that back.... I also found and watched an episode of "Cannon" that I had never seen before!  It was an episode about a siliceous writer who was in hiding because folks wanted to kill him before he finished his "Tell-all" book.  Watching the television show, "Cannon" makes me feel relaxed and joyful for some reason.  

Liz & Margaret said similarly.....

"Oh no, nightmare! Sometimes you can't see for looking.

"That would be terrifying! I am always worried about misplacing my keys. Glad you located them but the stress along the way was NOT a good thing. 

Yes, I am ALWAYS very, very nervous about the potential to lose my keys or my wallet.  I have had nightmares of it happening.  I luckily never PERMANENTLY lost my keys or wallet so far, but a half dozen times or so over the decades I have had pure panic in having lost one or the other for more than a week.  I am unfortunately rather forgetful (and have always been) about where those pesky things are.  

Margaret said....

"A late friend of mine had a powder blue Rabbit for a while. We loved seeing him drive in to the school parking lot. It didn't fit his personality at all.

The quirkiness of the VW Rabbit I think fit my personality well, and it was fun as hell to drive too.  The only vehicle I had that I do not think fit my personality was a black 1988 Mercury Topaz with beige interior I had for about two years.  Even though it was a small car, it was black (most awful color for a car in my opinion) and it just was not "me":

Margaret & AC commenting similar on teaching and August....

"We used to say that the whole month feels like 31 Sunday evenings. 

"Late August was somewhat of an anxious time for this educator.

Yes.... you both described it very accurately to how I have felt.  Interestingly, as the START approaches, the dread has declined.... probably mostly because it is inevitable.... like a a train speeding downhill will inevitably reach bottom.  

Pam J says....

"They talk about right-sizing yourself and your expectations of yourself.  … the quality of humility really breaks down to having a reasonable perspective of yourself. It is quite simply seeing the truth of your life and your place in the world... ...Gone is your self-entitlement or grandiosity; as is your shame, regrets or unworthiness.

That is really a lot to ponder, and I appreciate your writing this. I do not really have the words to express anything yet, as I am still mulling over the above.  But, I do think it is very important for me to think about and I thank you. 

Pat said....

Memories... when I was in 10th grade, my carpool driver took me to and from school in one of those, though I think it was a 1977 model. Same color and body shape, though. I remember the Rabbit Diesel as a nice enough sedan, but a bit spartan by the standard of my father's land yachts (Ford LTD around that time, if I'm remembering correctly).

Although my Dad was not fond of Fords (he prefered Chevrolet and Buick models).... he too liked the "land yacht" style beasts.  For me, the spartan-ness of the VW felt "refreshing" and the smaller size was a helluva lot more fun to drive.  I have always prefered small cars and small trucks.  

* * * * *

• I was able to get in my 10 miles (~16km) this morning.  That is good.
• I would say my PCS is still at 9+ today.  Looking at my pipes in the pipe rack and smelling the sweet pipe tobacco in the humidor is beyond enticing me.  It surely is.
• However, I would also say I feel more calm and less resigned to "gloom"
• Feeling less gloomy has me imagining hopeful, positive things for the weekend.

PipeTobacco