I am not sure where my mind is at. It is most likely because it is April and I am itching for a change in routine, but I have virtually no motivation for things work related. Let us see what has been my routine for say the last 4 days:
Friday: Instead of grading exams, drafting grant applications, and writing lectures and exams as was my plan for Friday, I instead walked around campus with the notion of taking photographs. But even that was limited as it seemed to require too much focus. Instead, I spent most of the morning sitting outside of campus on a bench, smoking my pipe and reading. Not reading something research/science related, mind you, but instead, I read a rather flimsy detective novel. Then in the afternoon, I went to visit my elderly father-in-law and we chatted and drank ourselves silly and smoked pipes and cigars. Finally, in my pleasant state I ended up going to the barber for a haircut and beard and moustache trim... mostly so I could swap wild tales with him and expound on life with my boozy breath.
Saturday: Instead of performing the house/yard tasks I had planned for the day, I instead went for a long drive. Upon returning from said adventure, where I parked myself in the woods and smoked my pipe and read, I came home and watched some of the sadness about the pope, but growing restless I went for another long drive, this time with my wife. Upon our return, I bedded my wife, and then we puttered around the house for a while, not interested in accomplishing anything. She was much more focused on accomplishing tasks that I was, and left me to my own devices for the afternoon, but after an enormous dinner, I was able to coax her into bed again before we watched "North by Northwest" on Turner Classic Movies. Finally we fell into bed, and we bedded again... a "three star" day, which has not occurred for quite some time.
Sunday: After struggling to get to 6am mass (I was not in a mood for crowds and this very early mass is usually sparsely attended), we had planned to go shopping and planning for this year's major yard tasks. However, again, I was not motivated to accomplish anything "work" related, and ended up coaxing my wife to sit around at a local coffeehouse/bookstore and we wasted the better part of the morning before we went to eat a huge breakfast at roughly 10:30. When we arrived home, the house was empty again, and even though my wife was again hopping to do some needed work around the home, I first coaxed her into the bedroom where we again enjoyed each other's company. Being the kind wife she is, she could tell that my mind was not on goals and work, so she encouraged me to go explore (so she could get some work done... both housework she had planned and career work she needed to finish prior to Monday morning). I *should* have also been working on those goals.... it was time for the extensive monthly vacuuming of our home (we vacuum weekly, but my wife is responsible for the quick vacuums, I am responsible for the multi-hour extensive (hyper) vacuuming and spot-cleaning, and stairs cleaning that we have assigned on a monthly basis. But again, I was not in any frame of mind to accomplish anything worthwhile, so I went on a trip to a very nice sporting goods store to look at fishing gear and hunting gear. After talking and bullshitting with the fellows in the store for the better part of two hours, I left and again found a park bench to sit at and enjoy a few bowls from my pipe. I am not sure what was happening, but for some reason, I was EXTREMELY enamored with my pipes and pipe tobaccos all weekend. And, as I sat there on the bench for an hour or so, I soon grew tired of the detective novel and began to sit and day dream. I sat and fired up several bowls of rich tobacco leaf, and focused intently on the myriad of pleasures and sensations as I would draw in a lungful of the creamy, rich smoke. I would purposefully be especially aware of the delightfully chalky feel of the rich smoke in my lungs, I could sense the surge of the beloved nicotine in my bloodstream and feel that blood as it fed into my brain causing gentle relaxation and pleasure. Nicotine binds to receptors in the region of the brain called the hypothalamus and is a pharmacological agent similar in function to the naturally produced brain endorphins. After being lost in thought and experience on that beloved neural pathway, I eventually headed home, where I again felt the randiest of urges and coaxed my wife into another bedding session.
Monday: Similar lack of motivation for work. Instead I again sat outside the building containing my office and laboratory and saturated every cell in my body with lovely pipe tobacco smoke. After the saturation, I moseyied over to the library, but instead of heading to the "Q" section where the majority of biology research journals and texts are located, I went in another direction to the area of literature and began thumbing through the University's collection of biographies on Hemingway, Steinbeck, and Faulkner... three of my very favorite writers of literature. I went back to my office to teach my two classes, but then hurried back to the library and spent the day exploring these author's lives. I eventually left in the afternoon with 4 books about Hemingway checked out in my name, and proceeded home.
That is it in a nutshell. I am not sure what the meaning of this 4 day "weekend" is other than to say 1) I renewed and deepened my love affair with nicotine, 2) I was in quite an above average state of arousal sexually, which was enjoyable for both myself and my wife, 3) I did not do a helluva lot (if any) of valuable work, and 4) I had many "large" and occasionally boozy conversations/encounters with people and non-science texts. What if anything do you make of these four days? I enjoyed them a great deal, but they are not sustainable, for I would get no work done. But is work over-rated? Who knows. I am not sure, but I am not certain I am through this phase, as I have not accomplished a damn thing today either. Comments greatly appreciated.